Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Counting down

I am less than three weeks away from starting my new career as a stay-at-home-mom. I really have nothing funny or interesting to say about that. I'm still nervous, and I really don't have much confidence in my ability to do the job well, but it's coming and I'm going to give it my best shot. I'm hoping that my boys stay resilient and that they are able to develop some kind of patience as I figure out how to navigate our new world.

I received this notice in my mailbox at work last week:

I started my job in 1997, but because of my year-long leave of absence when we were in Texas on Phil's internship, I don't have 10 year's credit until this year. I'm going to miss my anniversary by two months. For some reason, I'm kind of sad about that. It's not about the gift (as amazing as the selections are) or the framed certificate (with my name appearing however I want it to - do you think they would have printed "Julie, the Wonder Goddess of all Things BYU" if I asked for it?). It would have been nice to legitimately tell people that I worked at BYU for ten years. I'm sure I'll still tell people that, but if I had made my anniversary I wouldn't have to spend the rest of my life telling that little fib. I can imagine the conversation:

Unknown person in my future: Really? You worked at BYU? How long were you there?
Me: Ten glorious years.
Unknown person: Ten years. Wow. That's a long time.
Me: {guilt . . . guilt . . . I just lied to a stranger . . . guilt . . . guilt . . . }

Unknown person: Did you like it there?
Me: Ummmmmm . . .
Unknown person: What did you do?
Me: Okay! Stop grilling me. I lied. I started in '97 and left in'08, which I realize is 11 years, but I only get credit for nine years and ten months . . . I was gone for a year in the middle while my husband was doing an internship at Texas A&M. I hated Texas, by the way. If I had my choice I would have stayed at BYU the entire time. It's not really my fault that I didn't make the ten years. In reality, when I left it should have been two months shy of 11 years, not ten.
Unknown person: Whu??
Me: I left two months shy of my official ten year anniversary. I didn't get the gift. I didn't get the certificate with my name on it however I wanted it. When I said ten years, I exaggerated.
Unknown person: {running away}


Be honest, how many of you are scared for my boys?

4 comments:

KJae said...

Given the fact that you're completely ADAMANT that I'm no vegetarian, and you have convulsions every time you hear me say that I am, I can imagine that future conversation being precisely as you described.

Rats! I still think they should give it to you, or you should stick around two more months for the gift and certificate. Can you believe that I, of all people, am encouraging you to stay longer??!? What am I thinking????????

Julie said...

I'm confused . . . I don't recall getting all worked up over your vegetarianism claims. I think I just pointed out at one point that you aren't really a vegetarian. Bacon - even bacon that's carbonized - is still meat. According to wikipedia "A vegetarian does not eat any meat, poultry, game, fish, shellfish or crustacea, or slaughter by-products." Slaughter by-products? Mmmmmmmm . . .

and

What does your non-vegetarianism have to do with my future conversation. I'm missing the connection.

and

They still haven't even posted my job, so sticking around in some capacity for two more months may not be out of the question.

KJae said...

You've mentioned my non-vegetarianism several times in the same way. It's when you've overheard me telling someone that I am, then you let off on the "even bacon that's carbonized" type comments. I agree, I'm not a vegetarian! It's just always been easier to claim that title rather than delve into the fact that I am... with the exception of.... blah blah blah.... and I'm really picky on top of that.... yada yada yada. Get me?

I'm a little confused by myself as well, with this comparison to your future conversations. I think I was just trying to make the point that you will indeed be extremely down to the last detail accurate rather than claim you've worked there 10 years. Kind of like you won't give me my V title even though I'm closer to that than you are the 10 years. Did that make any more sense? Doubtful.

Are you talking to someone that counts on a regular basis to find out why it's not posted?

Myrn said...

Since it's just two months out of the rest of your life, I'd be tempted to say ... Stick around and get the gift. You earned it !!