Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Confessions of a 40-year-old Gym Rat (newly anointed)

I just got this email from Phil and although I am feeling deep sympathy for him (remember how I was experiencing this exact same thing just a couple of weeks ago), I chuckled all the way through it. Being the loving and supportive wife that I am, I thought it would be fun to spread the chuckles to the blog-o-sphere:

I have never been so sore in my entire life! I wasn’t horribly sore after Monday’s “workout”, so I went ahead and lifted last night as well. All was well until about 3:00 this morning when I was suddenly jolted from my slumber by the most excruciating pain in both of my elbows, or rather the muscles (what SHOULD be muscle) around the elbows. I then realize that, “ hey- I can’t move my elbows”! They won’t contract and they won’t extend, and any attempts to force them was met with tear producing pain. I laid there with my arms at 45 degree angles until it was time to get up, occasionally falling asleep, rolling over and then suddenly remembering why falling asleep and rolling over was a terrible idea.

Showering and shaving was an exercise in sheer terror and I quickly learned something about myself, or shall I say something about my new found situation. You see, I can’t bend my head down far enough for my arms and hands to reach the back of my head. Thus, only the top of my hair was sufficiently shampooed. I just hope that the back of my head caught some residual shampoo when I rinsed. But that isn’t the worst part. Try cleaning your arm pits when you have lost the function of your elbows- it ain’t gonna happen! Then came shaving and combing my hair. Again, I discovered just how grateful I am and just how much I took a full range of motion for granted. I fear that I look like a cross between Jed Clampet and some sort of a mad scientist.

Typing, on the other hand is a piece of cake- 45 degree angle baby! I wonder if people will think it strange when I burst into tears during meetings?

Just thought I would share the adventure of my morning with you.


Tee-hee. Gooooooo Phil!

3 comments:

Melissa said...

I giggled all the way through this. I recall him mentioning his elbows being sore today. I asked him if he had "pumped iron" at the gym, making a joke about him having moved up to the 5 lbs weights. He was like "No... really... it really was around 5 lbs..." Haha... oh. :)

mj said...

I'm so glad you shared.

Phil will laugh about it...later.

Colby said...

Phil...you need to work through that stuff...I can sympathize with you!